April 2012 is not a month that I want to replay ever again. I can honestly say I had two of the most scary days of my life in this month. But, I digress. I will start with the beginning.
Eli had a heart cath procedure done when he was three days old. That procedure did not take to him like he needed it to. His sats would not stay up and he had to stay on oxygen. Even so, he was alert and seemed happy. We were able to change his diaper, wash him, take his temperature and interact with him all day long if we wanted to.
The doctors decided to do a valvotomy on Eli that following Monday April 2. Dropping him off for that surgery is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Ever. I knew the surgeon doing the procedure. I knew the anesthesiologist. I knew most of the nurses. I knew the support staff. That didn't matter at all. That was my baby going in for HEART SURGERY. I don't think anything prepares you for that.
Once Eli went back, we went to the surgery waiting area. A lot of mine and Brandon's co-workers came to visit us and give us support. The support nurse from the OR came and updated us quite a bit. Eli did great during the procedure and it took less time than what they thought. While they were finishing up and he was waking up, they took me to the PICU and showed me where his room would be. We were all the way down at the end of the hallway next to where the OR is. The nice part about that is if there is an emergency, we are right next to the OR. The bad part is the doors were so loud, it was hard to get rest and try to relax.
Eli came into his PICU room in mid-afternoon. He was starting to wake up. He was on a ventilator and looked pretty good considering what he had just gone through. Well, he started to wake up and I will never forget the fear I saw in his eyes. He looked at me and his eyes open wide and he just talked to me with them. It about broke my heart to know I couldn't hold him, comfort him the way a mommy is supposed to. The nurses and doctors were giving him all kinds of medicine to calm him down and get his vitals under control. Once he fell back asleep, we were warned of what he would look like that night and the next day when we came back.
That night, I ended up staying at the Ronald McDonald house inside the hospital. That place is amazing; everything from the volunteers, to the food, to the help--simply amazing.
That night, I slept better than I had in a week. I felt really good about Eli and I was excited for his healing to start so we could talk about going home in a couple of weeks. When I walked into his room the next morning, there were all kinds of doctors in it. From students, to residents, to fellows to staff. Not to mention the nurses. I walked in there and they explained to me that we were going to have a rough day. Eli was still having desats and was having a rough time right then.
I thought, no big deal; it is the day after his surgery, of course he is going to have a rough day.
About 11:30, he started to desat with me in the room. The nurse came in and gave him medication. The doctor on staff for the heart patients stood there and watched him and gave medication orders as needed. The nurse administered the medications and bagged my child--BAGGED my child. They were as calm as can be. The respiratory therapists came in and adminstered changes in his oxygen levels. I sat there just dumbfounded; I couldn't believe this was my child going through this. Once they brought his numbers back up, I was unnerved. The good thing was that even though his O2 sats were low, his heart rate and pulse stayed high.
Well, the same thing happened again at 3:00. Only this time, I didn't hold it together so well. His sats dropped in the 30's and it took them forever to get them back up to the 80's. Once they did though, they told me that this is normal and they will do what is needed until he starts to heal from this surgery. However, this was the scariest day of my life.
Even with all of that, I ended up going home that night. I felt confident in the doctors and nurses and their words of optimism for Eli. When I woke up on the morning of April 4, I called into the hospital as I was getting ready to go see Eli. The cardiology fellow came on the phone and what she said was haunting to me. She told me that Eli had a very bad night. He wasn't keeping up on his oxygen and they were getting very concerned with how he was progressing. She told me when they had more information, they would call me. About 5 minutes later, Dr. Rotta called. He said that he, the cardiovascular surgeon and the doctor from overnight had all started to call each other at the same time to talk about sending Eli back into surgery to further help his valve. They were going to take in back in the next half hour.
Talk about panic. I live an hour away from the hospital and I still had to finish getting dressed, get the kids dressed and drive over there. Brandon stayed home and finished getting the kids ready while my mom and I sped to the hospital.
Part 2 to be continued.....
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